There had been weeks of solitary searching—that mighty river leading him on and on—but at last Albert Braithwaite had found his heart’s desire.
And he had survived the ensuing test—those agonising days of waiting and contemplation.
But finally he had his reward! A reward beyond what he had hoped for; a reward beyond what he had ever expected!
At first he was gladdened by this good fortune but slowly he began to consider. Was this too much for one man? Did he in truth deserve to keep it all?
All day and all night, he examined his heart, and all day and all night the name of that mighty river pounded and pounded in h
Flash Fiction Month 2017
31
Literature
Noir Comedy
I could tell she was trouble as soon as she walked into my office.
For a start she wasn’t wearing a mask.
I adjusted my own Private Investigator mask and watched her face closely as she explained why she’d come to me—emotions constantly skipping and dancing across the damn thing as she talked. Hell, I thought to myself. How is anyone ever supposed to read a person through all that noise?
But all other evidence was pointing towards her being a Femme Fatale. The expertly painted face, the curvaceous figure, the low neckline. And that sultry voice.
“It’s my husband, Wilbur Henderson,” she purred. “He
Flash Fiction Month 2016
31
Literature
Catty
In general, cats have nine lives.
Harold had 183.
He didn’t pay much attention to Alice’s chatter as he gobbled down his tuna chunks in the kitchen. She was a child, and a Dog Person, so it was unlikely she would ever have anything interesting to say. But something had certainly got her worked up.
Out of curiosity, Harold finally started to listen.
“I was suspicious of you from the start,” Alice was saying. “Did you really think no-one would ever notice?”
Harold finished the last chunk and looked up.
“Mrs. Deaking—used to enjoy a little Gilbert and Sullivan and then suddenly developed a ta
Flash Fiction Month 2015
31
Literature
I've Really Lost My Mind
The young man smiled, with just a touch of embarrassment. “I seem to have lost my mind.”
The female attendant looked at him. “This is a railway ticket office.”
“Yes..?”
“You want the lost property section over there.” She pointed at a counter where a severe-looking man was rearranging misplaced umbrellas.
“Thank you!” The young man nodded politely and headed across to the other section.
The lost property attendant looked up as the young man approached. “Is it an umbrella you want?” He indicated the display.
The young man appeared to be tempted for a moment by a purp
Flash Fiction Month 2014
31
Literature
The Back of the Sofa
In the communal living room of her student digs, Prudence knelt on the sofa and rummaged around between the cushions in the hope of finding her wayward fiver.
She frowned as she searched. The sofa certainly seemed to have a lot of give—her hand was sinking further and further and—
She barely had time to feel shocked as she slipped and fell. It only seemed a moment before she hit the ground and found herself once again in the strange world of Back O’ Th’ Sofa.
“Good heavens…” Prudence gazed about in wonder. “I thought I’d dreamt this place…”
“Prudence!”
She turn
FFM Flash Prompts
2
Literature
Deckchairs
“...and so we are here talking to Hubert Barraclough in order to find out more about this fascinating pastime.” Lavinia Clutterbuck pointed the microphone at Hubert. “It is a relatively unknown version of the game, isn’t it?”
Hubert smiled a little ruefully. “Sadly it is—even though Beach Poker is in fact the original form of poker. Admittedly nowadays it is generally played in private on artificial indoor beaches like this one but still…”
Lavinia nodded. “Can you take us through some of the aspects of Beach Poker?”
“Of course!” Hubert indicated the deckchairs in
FlashFictionLives 2016 Prompts
10
Literature
Something Personal
Doctor de Silva and Doctor Visser were going through the records at The Museum of Contagious Diseases.
“So this lady got hepatitis A… this gentleman got gastroenteritis… and this lady got chlamydia!” Doctor de Silva beamed. “Excellent!”
“Are you sure…?”
Doctor Visser smiled weakly.
“I really think we need to rethink the museum’s gift shop.”
55s
9
Flash Fiction
Flash Fiction Month 2016 31
Noir Comedy by SCFrankles, literature
Literature
Noir Comedy
I could tell she was trouble as soon as she walked into my office.
For a start she wasn’t wearing a mask.
I adjusted my own Private Investigator mask and watched her face closely as she explained why she’d come to me—emotions constantly skipping and dancing across the damn thing as she talked. Hell, I thought to myself. How is anyone ever supposed to read a person through all that noise?
But all other evidence was pointing towards her being a Femme Fatale. The expertly painted face, the curvaceous figure, the low neckline. And that sultry voice.
“It’s my husband, Wilbur Henderson,” she purred. “He
Ms. Patterson was smiling at him. “And so we’d like to offer you the position, starting immediately.”
“Thank you! Thank you so much!”
Terry beamed back.
“You know, I really can’t believe it. It’s my dream job. And I didn’t have to interview for it, the wages are twice those of my last job, the building is right next to my home, the office is painted exactly the colour of my bedroom and my primary school teacher is working on reception—”
He paused.
“Oh, no. This is a dream, isn’t it?”
Ms. Patterson raised her eyebrows. “Well, obviously.” She f
Fairy Gloria stared at her reflection in her enchanted mirror.
“It’s the final straw, Reflected-Gloria. Pixie Albert has left me.”
She moaned softly.
“I just feel so blue.”
Fairy Gloria pressed play on her tape machine and sang along.
“I woke up this morning and my pixie had gone.
“I said, I woke up this morning and that pixie was long gone—”
“I know he’s gone!”
Reflected-Gloria was grinning, ear to ear.
“Reflected-Albert has left me too! Isn’t it brilliant? We’ll be able to ask out that cute elf in the potions shop now.”
Fairy Gloria pres
The Baltimore police rushed in.
“The game’s up. We know you stole the money!” called the Captain. “Here’s the warrant to search your home!”
Harold Atkins went pale, and didn’t put up a fight as two officers grabbed him. He started to protest though when the Captain turned his attention to a woman cowering next to an equally frightened black man.
“That’s a friend of my wife! She has nothing to do with this!”
The Captain grinned. “Well, she’s got nothing to fear then.”
He addressed the woman.
“We’ll have to take your name and address, ma’am.
‘Tom Sturrock’ strode to centre stage.
“You Jezebel! Did you think you could betray me with that Ernest Jasper and get away with it? For this you will die!”
He strode stage right and began rummaging in a drawer.
Stage left, ‘Hilda Mould’ cried and wrung her hands.
“No, Tom! Please, no!”
Sturrock frowned down at the drawer and moved onto the one beside it.
“Oh, God! That isn’t what I think it is?” wailed Hilda.
Sturrock turned half round and mouthed urgently. “I can’t find it.”
He went down on his hands and knees and looked under the sofa—his bott
“...and so I told him you would settle the bill on Monday, dear,” bellowed Mrs. Constantine down the amplifying horn.
At the other end of the long tube, Mr. Hector Constantine winced and adjusted his earpiece.
Mrs. Constantine smiled apologetically. “Too loud?”
“A trifle, dearest.” Mr. Constantine sighed. “However, it is the distortion that is causing me the most distress.” He took out the earpiece, shook it and replaced it. “There surely must be a better solution for my failing hearing.”
“You should make the attempt yourself!” declared Mrs. Constantine, lowering her
“Flaming nova,” said Twinkling Star looking down. “Not again.”
“Why? What’s going—?”
Sparkling Star looked down too.
“Oh, great heavens above! Are they holding hands?”
“Afraid so,” said Twinkling Star. “And yes, of course—here comes the kissing…”
“Yuck, yuck, yuck.” Sparkling Star made a face. “I know we stars have to try to be tolerant…”
He glanced down again and winced.
“But why do these humans feel the need to get romantic always directly underneath us?”
The train journey had gone smoothly, the taxi had found the hotel on the seafront without any problems and now here Laura was, back in the Golden Moon Theatre after all these years, waiting to begin a dress rehearsal.
It would have been nice to say the theatre hadn’t changed. That it seemed like only yesterday since she’d last been here. However, the building managed to be both run-down and unappealingly done up. And the dressing room she'd been assigned seemed to be doubling as a storeroom for props.
Laura looked around. She wasn’t sure if it was because she had the passage of time on the brain, but the particular props t
“So this is the new keyboard you’ve been working on?” said Mr. Barker, head of Asterisk Communications.
Paul nodded enthusiastically. “You can see it’s in the shape of an arch, surrounding the typist…”
“And instead of each letter appearing only once, they appear in several places,” said Miranda. “Making typing much more user friendly.”
Paul pointed out various keys. “It can be used for other languages than English too. There’s é, ů, ç and so on. Everything you need for every language that uses the Latin alphabet.”
He looked up beaming.
R
Rock Vs. Paper Vs. Scissors by SCFrankles, literature
Literature
Rock Vs. Paper Vs. Scissors
“So what’s next?” asked Judge One-Potato-Two.
“It’s ‘Rock versus Paper versus Scissors’, concerning the marriage of those three parties,” said Cat’s-Cradle the clerk.
He considered the document before him.
“Rock and Scissors are petitioning to end the union between themselves but both still wish to remain married to Paper. And Paper is opposing the petition altogether. Wants to live with both of them.”
Judge One-Potato-Two sighed. “Well, Paper is going to have to grow up and learn to face reality. Surely they can move between households, spending their time equally wi